Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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