I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
