butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize