I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
