so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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