My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
