i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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