I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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