OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
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