So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
