You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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