Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize