i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize