There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
