looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I touched a dick in church today
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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