Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize