You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
