You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
