Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
