no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
