Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
