Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
