I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
