Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
