Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
