I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
