i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
