Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize