No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
