R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
