it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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