You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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