Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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