all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
