It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
