Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Randomize
