Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
