Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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