Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
