I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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