It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
