she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
