I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Vodka?
Forever.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Someone signed my nipple.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
