Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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