I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
