Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
