Pregnant stripper...not hot.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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