Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Why can't burritos get me drunk
COCAINE IS GR8
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