How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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