She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
