Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
